Quarters Worth

The 20 Worst Masks To Wear

During The Pandemic

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We’re not out of the woods yet, folks, as new cases of COVID-19 continue to mount.

Yesterday reported novel coronavirus infections in the US crested 2.25 million people. Total worldwide cases surpassed 8.5 million.

It sounds strange as all around us we see images making it seem as if the pandemic is subsiding. National and regional leaders push forward reopening businesses and easing restrictions on the population. Mass protests and social gatherings are sure to further exacerbate the situation in the coming days.

Despite certain people’s reluctance to adhere to it, the CDC still recommends that all Americans wear cloth face coverings. Us geeks have and always will refer to these face coverings as masks.

While some struggle with the idea of covering their mouth and nose in order to prevent the spread of their own germs to others, comic book nerds and cosplayers are well at home making the most of these unusual circumstances.

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No doubt there are many cool and unique ways of making masks work, but this week we are showcasing how not to wear a mask right now.

Here’s our list, in no particular order, of The 20 Worst Masks To Wear During The Pandemic.

Spoiler alert: Most of them don’t totally cover the mouth or nose. But prices and links to purchase have been included when available.



#1

Bozo

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$144.49 including shipping.

There’s nothing like walking around looking like a sad clown from Joker’s gang about to rob a bank.


#2

Spartan Helmet

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$84 with free shipping.

Cool helmet. . .

But it will only work with another mask or bandana under it.


#3

Scary Zombie

scary-mask-1

This is what I envision I’d look like if I contracted COVID-19.


#4

Miscellaneous Pop Culture Icon

mascarade-party-gear-famous-people-masks

As cool as it is to get mistook for a favorite celebrity from yesteryear, it kind of takes the swagger away if you still have to wear something over the bottom of your face.


#5

Arkham Scarecrow

scarecrow

$144.49

Not currently available. . .

Somehow I don’t think this item will be getting restocked anytime soon. . .


#6

Vader

(Not that Vader. . .)

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I can’t quite put my finger on why this mask wouldn’t work during the pandemic. . .


#7

Upside-down Head

Scary-Halloween-Devil-Masks-Creepy-Upside-down-Ghost-Adult-Latex-Mask-Horror-Movie-Cosplay-Prop

Alright, this would’ve been a winner at any Halloween party. . .

However, it’s highly likely Halloween will be cancelled this year.

Go f*** yourself, 2020!


#8

Batman’s Cowl

the-most-iconic-masks-in-movie-history-u1

Bruce, I know you’re rich and think the economy should be reopened so you can sell all that Lysol you stockpiled, but you’re covering the wrong part of your face, jackass!


#9

???

Trapped18_2

What exactly are we looking at here?


#10

Jigsaw

High-Quality-Resin-Grimace-Saw-Mask-Party-Masquerade-Cosplay-Movie-Game-Full-Face-Mask-Scary-Creepy

If you see someone wearing this, you probably have bigger problems than COVID-19.


#11 & #12

Hockey Goalie & The Mighty Ducks Logo

ducks

Obviously you’re going to have problems with breathing and droplets if you wear a hockey goalie mask.

Equally so if you wear the mask from the Disney Mighty Ducks logo. The holes are only the beginning of the problem. . .

Being bent up to accommodate a duck bill, maybe it will work for Donald and Daffy?


#13

Darth Vader

(That Vader, Sans-Helmet)

darth vader- unmasked

You’ve almost got it, Anakin, but it only works if you pull it up over your nose. . .

Kinda like those people in the grocery store with their masks below their mouths too.


#14

Catwoman

(from Batman Returns)

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Michelle Pfeiffer sure was hot for a dead woman.

I’m not sure how it’s relevant except dead people probably don’t have to worry about contracting a coronavirus.


#15

Fury In The Future

fury-in-the-future-half-mask

A steal for only $7.99 plus shipping, but also currently out of stock.

It might work if it wasn’t for those dang nose holes. . .


#16

Steampunk Half-Mask

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People sure are creative on Etsy. . .

But this one misses the CDC mark entirely.


#17

Devil

scary-devil-mask

No one really wants to see him right now.


#18

The Daffy Donald

daffy donald

The only thing worse and scarier right now than getting spit on by Daffy Duck—or anyone for that matter—is finding out that Daffy is really Donald.


#19

Let Me Out

let-me-out-350

Hold up. . .

This is what I picture I’d look like if I got COVID-19.


#1

No Maskthe wanderer

Far and away the worst mask to wear during a pandemic.

People who care about their fellow humans should wear at least a cloth covering over their noses and mouths.

Do the right thing for everyone and cover your face holes.



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We hope you enjoyed reading our list of The 20 Worst Masks To Wear During The Pandemic. There were so many excellent terrible choices.

If you thought this piece was insensitive in any way, please lighten up. Laughter is the best elixir during these crazy times.

And until next time. . .stay geeky!

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Written by John Andreula & edited by Kodid Laraque-Two Elk

John Andreula is a mask-wearing vigilante writer living in Colorado.

Hit him on Instagram at:

JohnAndreulaWritesStuff

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